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Single life

Does there have to be a sparkle on the first date?

The first date does not necessarily say anything about whether two people can fall in love or not.

Two of a kind?

The longer the search for a partner takes, the more impatient some people get. They long and anticipate finding the one, true love. In their impatience, they develop a kind of expectation, which only has one goal; to end their loneliness, and every small detail is magnified - because just “sympathy” is no sign of true love. These people move from one date to another, and thus achieve the exact opposite of what they actually want.

The economics of dating

There are people who make of “Dating” a purely economic matter. They have fixed criteria, as to how their partner should be, and often have very specific ideas about character and appearance of which they differ only reluctantly. Sometimes stuck behind bad past experiences, sometimes it's really just the loneliness that makes them so calculating. Some people push it so far that they aim for a certain dating rate per week or month, simply to increase the chances of “scoring”.

The myth of the first impression ...

... is of course not really a myth, but the first impression is ultimately just that, what we make of someone and is often overrated. Love at first sight does exist, but it is not necessarily the only true love that carries a guarantee for eternity - and it is also not bigger than a love that develops slowly.

Experts say that it is the first few seconds that it is decided if there is affinity between two people. But affinity is not the same as infatuation. So if there is no great dislike at first, it is often worth risking a second or third "look ", meaning you should not put a stop to meeting again.

Humans are complex beings

For making a quick decision, humans are much too complex. Someone who can barely open their mouth on the first date is either caring around a bunch of bad experiences or is shy and needs to jump in the pool first – which requires confidence. Even overexcitement or being scared of giving the wrong impression, can turn someone who has an alert personality into a lethargic and introverted person for the moment.

So take a deep breath, get away from your loneliness and give love the only thing it really needs: time.


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